My doctor is talking tonsillectomy. Anybody done this as an adult and have any advice for me? I’m not excited, but if I have to do, I want to do it before I start chemo. Anybody know if doctors do surgery pro bono? 😀 Obviously, I have to talk to Dr. P. (sarcoma doc) before I make any decisions, but tonsillitis is awful. To top it all off, I’m apparently having an allergic reaction to one of the medicines the doctor prescribed. I broke out all over, am itching like crazy, swollen all over… An amazing friend is bringing over Benadryl, which the doctor told me to take. He’s also prescribing a different antibiotic. Does the pharmacy take back unused drugs? Because I’m a little tired of paying for them and not being able to use them.
I’m trying to get prepared for Houston as best as I can while feeling miserable. The folks at the hospital are actually cracking me up. I have received no less than two e-mails and three phone calls reminding me of my appointment. I have confirmed every single one of these. Do people actually forget appointments to see the leading cancer doctors in the world? I mean, really.
So today will be spent enjoying ice cream and my bed, once the itching stops. I’ll try to post again as I get to Houston and keep you updated on what I know.
As the month of June draws to a close and I get closer to the time I will need to go to Houston, I realize that I am scared. It’s been really easy this month to just hide my head in the sand and pretend like all is normal. I have had a fantastic month with my husband and son, and I so don’t look forward to becoming sick again. I am currently in a Bible study at church where we are talking about what women fear. The book we are reading is not doing it for me, but the bonus is that each week I get new Bible verses about fear.
“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9
Matthew 10 “28 Do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. Rather, be afraid of the One who can destroy both soul and body in hell. 29 Are not two sparrows sold for a penny ? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from the will of your Father. 30 And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. 31 So don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.
Hebrews 13:6- “So we say with confidence, ‘The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?’
Isaiah 41:10 – So do not fear, for I am with you;
do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you;
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
I am working on committing these to memory. I honestly don’t know what to pray for some days. Should I pray for strength? For grace? Cancer is such an over-arching thing; it takes over everything. Sometimes I let it overwhelm me. But why should I? Cancer is not bigger than my God.
As I begin to step forward into this next very difficult time in my life, I know in Whose hands I reside. He has shown us time and time again that He will always be there for us. It is often that I only see His hand when I look backwards, at events that are long past. I pray that I will be able to see His hand in the moment through this battle. And I pray that I will be able to rest in Him, not rely on my own strength.
I think I forgot to post when MD Anderson published my post on their Cancerwise blog. It’s up, from last Thursday, if you’re interested. Sorry! I posted on Facebook, but I forgot here. It’s a little choppy and there’s an error in there that irritates me (because I am totally a grammar nazi) but as I often say, “It is what it is.”
Thanks for the prayers! Little Man is out of surgery, but recovery was difficult. He is currently asleep and I hope he will be better when he wakes up.
First off, thank you so much for all the suggestions to get some more protein in me. I’m mainly looking for snacks and breakfast options, and I got a lot of great ones.
Tomorrow we take my Little Man in for tubes in his ears and to have his adenoids out. He did well with the first surgery, but it was more than a year ago. He’s much more independent now and I think it’s going to be hard. This will officially use all the medical money we had set aside for the year, so everything else will be out of pocket.
I talked to my pharmacist today. She has been really amazing at helping us with costs of drugs, so I asked her if there was a way to get the $67/ month drug (Premarin, for menopause) down to something less. Most of the cost per month comes from that and every time we have to fill something stronger for Little Man when he gets yet another ear infection. Anyway, they looked up an alternative drug that is only one form of estrogen instead of the two in the Premarin. It costs $3/ month. So after my trip to Houston, if the doctor there okays me staying on estrogen with chemo or radiation, I’ll be asking my OB if he’ll prescribe that instead.
Hopefully this surgery will get my Little Man back to his usual healthy self. I truly hate it when he isn’t feeling well. I’m just glad the doctor could fit us in before I have to leave for Houston. So as nervous as I am for Little Man tomorrow, I’m glad it’s happening. But we could certainly use some prayers!
I’m sure I mentioned that part of the Oncology Wellness program is meeting with a nutritionist. When I met with her last week, she told me that she really wants me to get between 80-100 grams of protein every day. When I left her office I felt confident, but a few days later, I’m having trouble. I need recipes. I typically only eat chicken and fish, and I don’t even do those every day. I am attempting to eat beef roast or pork roast, and adding eggs, but I need new recipes. Please share any recipes you have!
Today was a hard day for me. Sometimes emotions hit me when I least expect them to. I knew that I have really been dreading the dentist appointment I had today, but I could not figure out why. Suddenly on the way over, I remembered that I was pregnant the last time I saw them. And I really didn’t want to get into the whole story with them.
Luckily when I got there, they already knew. But that didn’t stop me from crying through the whole appointment. And when I found out I had two cavities. Y’all, I haven’t had a cavity since I was like seven years old. But two cavities shouldn’t make me cry like a baby.
But then tonight some people came over from our church. They prayed for us and then proceeded to several things around the house. They cleaned out our garage, reorganized the closet in what will be my son’s new room, and cleaned out all of the dead branches, etc. in our backyard. It was such a blessing. It reminded me that my God will always take care of me. I may not understand what is happening or why my emotions randomly get out of control, but He is still taking care of me.